It is the Wife's fault he cheated right?

Today, I ventured out for coffee with a girl I used to be friendly with before I moved down South.  At the table next to us were to young girls.  One (pretty little thing about 20) was telling how her boyfriends wife had become suspicious with the regular smell of perfume on him.  They laughed and the other suggested that next time they had sex in his car, she should leave her underwear for his wife to find.  The thought of his wife finding our her husband had betrayed her in such a devastating manner amused these two girls considerably.

It made me wonder if  J had talked about me like that.  Was I ever public conversation? Was I laughed and ridiculed over coffee?  If it hadn't been for the utter shock I felt, I would have went over, sat down, and explained to them the devastation they were causing.  

Whilst trying hard not to cry as old wounds were opened,  my new friend commented on how stupid some ladies can be.  Well  I sure am stupid,  I thought she was referring to the two young ones but no! she was referring to the wife who obviously wasn't satisfying her husband.   My face flushed red, my heart was racing. Another panic attack.  When will this ever end?  Is it really my fault?   I wasn't a bad wife.  I loved my husband, we had fun together, a good sex life.  Our relationship wasn't broke.  He just decided to have sex with a colleague during his lunch break.